THE HURTING HEART OF JOB/THE VALUE OF A FRIEND

Job 2:11 - 5:27
We might all use words like...loyal, kind and loving to describe a true friend. As I was reading the comments made to Job by his friends, I had to gulp as I thought of the words I have given to friends, not understanding their grief.

This scene opens in Job 2:11. Job is sitting on the ground covered with ashes, scraping his sore covered body with a piece of broken pottery. Job had lost his children...that is enough to cause a man to break. He had lost his "stuff" and was receiving "0" comfort from his angry, grieving wife. As I pondered her anger, I gained some insight into her statement, "Just curse God and die." She too had just lost the children she bore and all she possessed. They were both grieving in different ways. So, I guess I will back down slightly from my first impression of the woman and cut her a little slack. (OOO, was I acting like Job's friends?!?)

In the next scene, we see Job's friends coming to grieve with him. They were deeply moved by their friend's destruction and wept when they saw him. They entered into his grief by sitting with him in silence for an entire week. You know how it is when you have kept your mouth from speaking "junk". Someone you feel comfortable with enters your life, and major venting begins. That is exactly what happened to Job.

Beginning in Job 3:1-26, we see the extent of Job's suffering. He wishes he had never been born...and if he HAD been born, he wishes he would have died at birth. Then he thinks...if he COULD die, then at least he could have a king's honor...he could be with the wise men of the earth. At this low point in Jobs life he reasons death is the only way out. As he vents his condition, he ponders what death would bring...he would not have to deal with the wicked..he would not be weary...there would be no slavery or bondage to sickness...he would be filled with peace and quietness. Perhaps Mrs. Job was right..."just die."

With the pouring out of his grief to his friends, the dialogue begins...Eliphaz is the first to respond. (his name means "My God is Fine Gold" or another meaning is "God is my strength. He was a descendant of Esau!) As you read this chapter, see if you find as I did, Eliphaz contradicting himself. It is obvious, he did not understand...but rather than admit his own ignorance of the ways of God, he continues to give poor advice. I have a challenge for you.... Read this chapter (Job 4:1-5:27), and come up with a list of your own discrepancies.

True or False

Plus or Minus

You rate these statements. Are they true or false. Are they encouraging or discouraging...you JUDGE the words of Eliphaz the Temanite! (This has been Cherylized)

1. Job, you have encouraged so many and now you are discouraged.

2. Job, you are blameless...put your confidence and hope in your blamelessness.

3. God does not DESTROY the innocent!

4. What evil men sow, they will reap evil.

5. God is just.

6. God looks for fault in us, and forgets us when we are broken so that we die without wisdom and just wither away.

7. Job, you call all you want to, but who is going to listen!

8. Job, I think you are full of resentment and envy and you are acting like a fool.

9. Job, only a fool has his children crushed and his possessions taken.

10. Hard times always have a root of sin...they don't just come out of nowhere.

11. What I would do is build a case for myself before God.

12. Job, God is able and just so call on Him, maybe He will hear you.

13. Job, God is surely disciplining you so don't reject His disciplining.

14. If you hadn't done something wrong, you wouldn't be suffering.

15. Take our counsel. We know we are right because we took a committee vote on your situation and that makes us right.

16. You need to do what we say.

Do you see Eliphaz giving sound words of encouragement? Did you notice he contradicts his own words? Even He is trying to understand God!

"Oh Lord, help me to know you so well, when I speak to someone, it is your words and not the wavering words of a fool."

My husband and I lost our first child through miscarriage. A caring friend who did not know what to say said this to me..."It's okay, you will be able to have other children!" For those of you who have suffered the loss of a child, even if it is the loss of an unborn child, you know these words did not ease our grief. About a year later, she lost a child through miscarriage and when I went to see her, the first words out of her mouth were in the form of an apology. She said, "I didn't know how you felt...I am so sorry." But I already knew she didn't know what to say and I certainly did not want her to experience the same loss I had experienced.